29 and feelin' fine

I turned 29-years-old on March 2nd. I can't believe I'll be 30 in a year! Where has the time gone?! It seems like just yesterday I was at the age where I had no worries and no responsibilities. Just living a carefree life. Running around in jelly shoes, my hair a mess, dirt smeared across my face, scrapes and bruises on my knees from wrecking my bike. Ahhhh, what a life! Now I have tons of worries and responsibilities. Mortgage, car payment, student loans, a job, and my biggest worry and responsibility of them all...my son! Growing up sucks! I guess it's now Pacen's turn to live the carefree life (for a while anyway) and I'm going to try my hardest to make it very enjoyable for him.

The first thing Pacen asked me on my birthday was if I had cried when I woke up. I cried when I turned 25 cause I thought of it as being a quarter of a century old. I cried last year cause, well, I don't know why. Possibly because I knew in two short years I would hit 30. This year I actually didn't cry. I'm surprised I didn't, but I think I know why I didn't. Recently my mom told me 40 is supposedly the new 30 so in my head, 30 is the new 20. So I won't be 30 next year, I'll be 20 again! Yay!! Thanks mom!

I had a really good birthday, especially considering I was worried about some family health issues going on at the same time. The Friday before my birthday I got to spend the evening with my long-time best friend, Sunny. It was a night of great food, a good movie, good coffee, some needed laughs, and absolutely wonderful company! On my birthday I worked, but I got to enjoy dinner at The Pizza Place with Raine, Pacen, and my dad. (Mom was on her way to Missouri to be with my family as my Grandpa had a small stroke on the 1st.) After dinner we went to my house for cake that Nan (my Grandma) had made and then I lifted weights with Raine and Amanda while Pacen was at wrestling practice. Tonight I am joining some great friends and my wonderful sisters for a late birthday celebration. I feel extremely lucky to have so many great people in my life and I don't know what I would do without them!

On a side note, as you may know I compare my life to a bubble. I'm just trying to float through life without 'popping" and over the years there have been some "sharp objects" thrown in my path that have threatened just that, and I must say this past year consisted of one of the biggest obstacles I've had to deal with. I have made it through the worst part, but not without some "scars". I realize, though, that all the obstacles I've overcome have only made me stronger. They have caused me to have realizations about what I want out of life and, therefore, have somewhat caused me to become a new person. I'm stronger, full of even more determination, wiser, and "harder". I'm not completely changed...I still have compassion, I'm still a "softy", I still tend to wear my emotions on my sleeve, I still have a hard time being mean (unless it's called for)...but I am done sitting around and taking crap off people and I am going to start living life the way I want. I am going to follow my dreams and I'm not going to let anyone get in my way (except for Pacen). That is kind of a birthday present to myself...giving myself permission to do what I want without feeling selfish.

Self-portrait of a 29-year-old! :)

"What could be more beautiful than a dear old lady growing wise with age? Every age can be enchanting, provided you live within it." ~ Brigitte Bardot

Photography

As some of you may know I really enjoy photography. I'm not the best photographer by any means, but I try to do my best. I still have a long way to go! :) A small percentage of what I've learned about photography was by experimentation, but a majority of the things I've learned came from various blogs and Flickr. The same can be said about what I've learned when it comes to photo editing (using Photoshop or Photoshop Elements), but most of what I've learned about photo editing came from the Pioneer Woman. The tutorials on her site (not all posted by her) are absolutely wonderful! Sometimes I still stumble upon something new when working with Photoshop and part of the time I have no idea how I managed to make a picture look the way it turned out. About 56% of the time that happens, I like what I see. This was the case last night. About two years ago I took a picture of my favorite candelabra. The lighting seemed perfect and I loved the way it's shadow fell across my great-grandparent's dining room table (handed down to me). Last night I re-discovered that image in one of the MANY picture folders on my computer and I decided to play with it in Photoshop Elements. I ended up with three different versions that I really like. The third picture happens to be one of the types of pictures I mentioned above...the kind that I have no idea what I did to get the result, but I like it!





"There are always two people in every picture: the photographer and the viewer." ~ Ansel Adams

My True Love

I have one true love. No, it is not the love for a man. Yes, I love my son - he has a place in my heart that nobody else will ever have access to - but my one true love isn't even human. My one true love is...the ocean. The deep blue. The briny deep. Most of my life I have held a profound fascination for the great blue ocean. I don't recall how old I was when I first read about or was told about the ocean, but from that moment on I've been mesmerized. Everything about the ocean amazes me. The millions of creatures, the cycle of the tides, the different currents, how absolutely enormous it is...everything.




I have only been to the ocean three times in my 28 (almost 29) years. Only three times?! That is just sad. The ocean is where I am meant to be. Period. I am in love with it and always will be. When I am on, near, or in the ocean I am at peace and I am happy.


Last week when I was on vacation in Florida it was my third time seeing the ocean. I spent a lot of time on the beach near our condo, staring out at the blue expanse, letting the salty breeze blow through my hair, and listening to the waves crash. So peaceful. I even braved the 54-56 degree water one day. My sisters and I drove to Flagler Beach, I slipped into my wetsuit (a shorty - my legs and arms were bare), and waded about chest deep into the water. I didn't go under and actually swim, but by the time I was done frolicking in the water I was wet from head to toe due to the many waves. It felt great. I could have played in the waves all day, but we had other things to do.

I have always wanted to get a picture of the inside of a wave, aka, the curl. It is a lot harder than I thought it would be. Maybe it would be easier at a location where the waves get a little larger. Maybe someday I'll find out. As for now, I'm impatiently awaiting my next encounter with my one true love.






"I must go down to the sea again, to the lonely sea and the sky; and all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by." ~ John Edward Masefield

Lacking...

...motivation, inspiration, etc. For the past few months I have not felt like doing anything. I didn't get into the Holiday Spirit during December like I have in the past and I am seriously lacking motivation to train for the Triathlon I'm participating in on August 1. I haven't even felt like doing many of the things I enjoy, such as practicing photography. I don't know what is wrong with me and I don't like it. Okay, so I do know part of what is causing this. It's something I just need time to get over and apparently it is going to take A LOT longer than I want it to. Who knows, I may never totally get over it; all I can do is push on.

I hate being in this slump and I hate the fact that I have been extremely tired the past few months, yet haven't been able to sleep worth a darn. If I could lay on my couch or in bed all day and hide under my blankets, away from the world, I would.

I'm just sad, that's all. I will get out of this slump. I will become motivated to start doing the things I love again. I will become happy again (not the "fake happy" I've been putting on my face...the "real honest-to-goodness happy" that I used to feel every day). Maybe when Spring arrives and the flowers begin to bloom my mood will change.

I went to Florida for a week with my sisters this month and that helped lift my spirits a little, but not as much as I thought it would. Being near the ocean, having the ocean breeze blow through my hair, soaking up some rays (on the couple of days it was nice enough to want to be out long enough to soak up some rays), digging my toes into the sand, listening to the waves crash on the beach, etc. was absolutely wonderful, but something just wasn't right...I'm guessing it's that thing that's been unable to leave my mind and been tugging at my heartstrings for a while now. All I can do is keep pushing on and let time take care of things.

"Bear and endure: This sorrow will one day prove to be for your good." ~ Ovid

My little Pumpkin Carver

Halloween is over and today I took down all our spooky decorations. It was a good Halloween and the day was perfect for trick-or-treating. I was afraid it would be so cold, but it was actually pretty warm. The only problem was the slush! I can only imagine how wet all the little trick-or-treaters got. A few nights ago we carved pumpkins. I will admit at first I wasn't into it like I have been in the past. I wasn't looking forward to cleaning up the gooey, slimy, seedy mess. I was planning on doing a real simple design and at the last minute I got a little more excited about it and chose a design that was a slightly more difficult than I had planned.

Pacen, on the other hand, was very much into carving pumpkins this year. He carved an itty-bitty one and a very large one earlier in the month and this time he carved another large pumpkin. He carved a cute face into his itty-bitty pumpkin and a moose head into his first big pumpkin (I drew it and he cut it out). He turned his second big pumpkin into a murdered pumpkin. The funny thing about Pacen carving pumpkins is the fact that somehow he ends up in his boxers during the process. First the shirt comes off, next thing I know the pants come off, and a little later off come the socks, and then he's just carving away in his boxers! It's pretty funny. I guess real men carve pumpkins wearing only their underwear. :) I'm actually very grateful that I don't have to worry about washing pumpkin goop out of his clothes!

My Ghostly Lava Lamps

"Only the knife knows what goes on in the heart of a pumpkin." ~ Simone Schwarz-Bart

My Little Picky Eater

My son is probably the oddest picky eater ever! He is opposite of most picky eaters I have come across. He loves vegetables and salad and stuff like that and hates things such as spaghetti and macaroni & cheese! I thought all kids loved spaghetti and macaroni & cheese! Not mine! I am a total pasta person and if I want pasta I usually have to order it at a restaurant or make it while Pacen is gone...unless, of course, I want to hear a bunch of whining, which I don't!

Yesterday I was trying to decide what to fix for supper last night. I've been having major difficulties the past month because I have been oven-less! It has been dreadful! I always knew I used my oven a lot, but I guess I never realized just how much until mine died. Rest in peace old, ugly oven! I was suppose to have a new oven by now but there was an accident. My family owns two True Value stores...one in the town I grew up in and the other is in a town 30 miles from there. My dad drove to the other store, picked up my new oven, and on the way home a semi drove past him and blew my oven over (yes it was tied down) and broke the glass out of the door! It's my luck! Things like this always happen to me! I don't know what I ever did to deserve the luck I have, but I guess I just have to live with it. Maybe I can offer some sort of sacrifice to the gods/goddesses/higher beings/whatever so my luck will change. I offer my old oven! :) Okay, anyway...my new oven door has not arrived yet for my new oven so I am still oven-less!

Oh, I got really side tracked there. Sorry. So, I was searching for something to fix for supper, something that could be made on the stove top. That is when I came across a skillet recipe on this blog that I follow. I had almost all the ingredients and I had other things I could use to substitute for the ingredients I didn't have. No grocery store visit? Yay!!!! :) So, I fixed up the recipe when I got home from work and it looked nothing like the picture on the blog so I was a little leery about serving it to Pacen, but we have a rule in my house: I fix it, you eat it. Maybe I should make that rule with the pasta too, but I try to avoid making things that I know he absolutely does not like. Anyway, the time came to serve it up and he loved it! He had two huge servings and is excited that we are having it as leftovers tonight! Yahoo!!! I love it when I find a recipe that is easy and that Pacen likes! This recipe is definitely going in the "make again recipe box"!

So, without further adeu, here is the recipe (and my substitutions/changes):

Romano Ranch Chicken and Rice Skillet Dinner

- 2 large boneless skinless chicken breasts
- 1 packet Ranch Dressing dry mix, divided
- 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
- 1 large onion, finely diced (I used a little onion powder)
- 1 green bell pepper, diced
- 6 cloves fresh garlic, minced (I used the pre-minced kind in the jar, which is the best thing since sliced bread)
- 6 cups fresh spinach leaves, coarsely chopped (I used about a 1/2 bag of frozen spinach, which I would guess was around 10 oz.)
- 1 small can diced carrots and peas, drained (I used a 15 oz. can of just peas)
- 2 cups steamed long grain brown rice (I used instant brown rice cooked in the microwave)
- 1 tsp salt
- 1/4 tsp black pepper
- 1/4 tsp garlic salt
-1/2 cup shredded Romano Cheese (I used Cheddar Cheese)

The first step is to preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Ha! I ended up cooking my chicken in the skillet over medium heat, which was a lot faster than baking it in the oven anyway. While the chicken was cooking I diced the pepper and started the rice. When the chicken was done I removed it from the skillet and drained any juice that was left. I then added the olive oil and let it heat up. Next I added the green pepper, garlic, spinach, and onion powder and let saute for 6-10 minutes (until the spinach was heated through). While the veggies were sauteing I cut up the chicken. Next I added the peas, cooked rice, salt, pepper, garlic salt, and ranch mix. I stirred it up and let it sit for a few minutes to heat through. I then added the chicken and cheese and stirred again. Time to serve! Easy and pretty fast! (It just sounds more time consuming than it really is.)

(The lighting in my kitchen is dreadful!)

"When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste." ~ Laiko Bahrs

Halloween

Halloween is by far my most favorite Holiday! I don't know why...maybe it's the mystery that surrounds the Holiday or maybe it's the fact that we get to dress up and pretend to be somebody else. I honestly can't tell you why I love Halloween so much...I just do and I always have. This past weekend a friend of mine and I threw a Halloween party at my house. It took us a couple weeks to plan it all and get everything prepared, but it was so worth it. We made many of the decorations ourselves and created a list of nasty looking food. We also made the invitations and that alone took us two nights and two bottles of hard booze! :) We had fun planning and preparing, but I must say that I'm glad it's all over with (I think she's glad too) as it was a lot of work and took up a lot of time.

One of the best things about preparing for the party was the fact that I had no choice but to get off my lazy rump and thoroughly clean my house. I've been needing to do it for a long time but I just haven't felt like conquering it! :) Unfortunately, some major cleaning had to be done the day after the party too. :) Okay, actually, all that really had to be done was some major mopping...my kitchen floor was so nasty! My friend, Alex, did a pretty good job of picking up stray beer cans/bottles and cups the night before! Raine, Dawn, and Sham helped me sweep and pick up the rest of the trash. It's so great to have friends who are willing to help with the nasty, not-so-fun aspects of such things as a party! :)






"Eat, drink, and be scary." ~ Unknown

"When witches go riding, and black cats are seen, the moon laughs and whispers, 'tis near Halloween!" ~ Unknown